
That b*tch is crazy!.!.! Someone get a restraining order!

Seriously. You don't make those kinds of "jokes" to a ~5-year-old. That was beyond creepy.

That happened to me once but the difference is that I was 12yrs old cause my dad was cheating on my mom and I was playing on facebook and I had her as a friend and she was like "hey, I'm your new mom" and I texted her back " what the hell you crazy bitch" and she was like "you shouldn't treat your new mother like that" and I was like "you need mental help ma'am" and then she was like "don't worry, I'm getting all the help I need from your dad" I told my mom and they got divorced. My dad is seriously an asshole (〜 ̄△ ̄)〜

Wow, that woman sounds like a real piece of work. Trying to assert herself as your "new mother" when she has neither earned the right nor deserves it just because she's boinking your dad. Not to mention you already have a mom! That bitch can fuck off. A 12-year-old is still a child, so that whole conversation should be deemed harassment of a minor, and along with icing her ass in a jail cell she should be slapped with a restraining order.

Boinking my dad lol ლ(´ڡ`ლ) well he is still sleeping around with women although he did get in trouble once because he slept with a married women and her husband threatened my dad with a gun I was laughing while my mom was worried I told my mom to stop tat because their not married anymore she told me this "you don't understand because your still a child" and then I told her my dada cheated on her because she was dumb and I got grounded ╮( ̄▽ ̄)╭

Sounds like she meant something along the lines of, "You're still a child, so you wouldn't understand how much you can still care about someone even if they've deeply hurt you and left you."
However, what she's failed to take into account is that that man is still your father. You are already in a position to understand that type of emotional conflict. Yet you were able to laugh at him getting his just deserts. She hasn't fully let go of what she thought she had, nor faced the reality of how big an asshole he really is.
Calling your mother dumb was harsh, and there are better ways to say it, but at the same time it's your family, you're both in a similar position, so you have some room to talk. He hurt you both.

Actually he is my step-dad, I never met my real dad but my mom said that he use to hit her a lot and I like my mom but I'm not attached to her she left me and my big sister for about 2yrs I don't hold grudges but the women that took care of my sister and me during those two yrs. hit us hard and one time made us bleed and had to take us to the hospital this happened at age 3-5
ε=ε=(ノ≧∇≦)ノ
They're so adorable!