Kawaiineko❤namjoon's Topics (1885)

Spoilers
The only time that Dohyun acted a bit coercive about sex was when Sungho asked him if they could do something else other than sex at the warehouse, like old times, and, Dohyun got that English book to "study" vocab on his body... but even then, u can see that he didn't force him to do it, he was just very unsympathetic considering Sungho had just opened up about his fears and concerns.
Other than that, Dohyun was just enjoying having intimacy with someone he was attracted to and made him feel happy and wanted. A rarity in his life.
It is unfortunate that Sungho interpreted sex something negative. The reality is that it was Sungho who introduced the sex to their relation and as time progressed and his mental health started going downhill, used it as means of controlling Dohyun into being emotionally dependent on him.
I believe that as their relationship progressed, Sungho wasn't having sex w Dohyun as an act of love amymore but mainly just to keep Dohyun manipulated. This is why he said that having sex with Dohyun made him feel dirty and disgusting because in the bottom of his heart he knew that what he was doing was wrong. He decided to blame Dohyun for it neglecting his own choices in the proces.

Sungho never manipulates Dohyun. He indeed invited Dohyun to have sex first, but it's because he didn't know what else he could do to connect their relationship again. After that, he tried to convey that he didn't want to do it, and this was where Dohyun manipulated Sungho. He knew Sungho could never bear to let him go, so he acted as if things would end if they stop doing it. Like he had said many times, he thought Sungho being desperate over him was cute and he liked it since for the first time he felt wanted, so he always intentionally ignored Sungho to get him more desperate. Sungho, who didn't want to lose him, of course went along with him, and even if he was the one initiating he did it because he was afraid Dohyun would stop seeing him if he thought he wasn't into it. He was also scared of disappointing anyone, not only Dohyun, but also his family. The reason he felt dirty was thanks to his family's teaching, which was very strict he couldn't even have a porn, that made him think what they were doing was a taboo. I know there's so many fantasy about having sex at school, but you really shouldn't do that, dear. And he was right, the moment he was caught, everything crumbled down. And Dohyun, he indeed manipulated him, but not for Sungho to do it with him, like I said he just like Sungjo being desperate over him. He didn't actualy think or care much whether Sangho liked doing it or not, he was too full of himself to see many signs Sungho showed that he didn't like it, that he was breaking down because of it in addition to being ignored. In my opinion, back then, they were both wrong, and the fault also didn't just lie on them, it was the fault of people around them too who made them to be such lonely people and caused them to act the way they did. But well, this is just my opinion and my interpretation of the story :D

I just wanted to talk about this bit here. The thing is, after Sungho rejected Dohyun when he first tried to kiss him, Dohyun stayed friends with Sungho for many months afterwards. He was fine to hang out with Sungho without sex.

It was only a year or so later when they got split into different classes that they started to drift apart. Dohyun thought that was just a natural consequence of them living in different worlds, and was going to let it happen, but Sungho didn't want that to happen and so offered sex, thinking that that would make Dohyun stay. And Dohyun went along with it because he thought it would give Sungho a reason to stay. 

You can see in chapter 46 he actually tells Sungho to knock it off and not get so close and personal because he has feelings for Sungho and doesn't want Sungho to mess him around. But Sungho kisses Dohyun anyway.

Also in no case Dohyun's actions back then, which were disproportionately smaller than Seunho's who had problem from the very start, should justify and excuse Sungho's dehumanisation, horrible actions later.

"he was too full of himself to see many signs Sungho showed that he didn't like it, that he was breaking down because of it in addition to being ignored" I would argue. It's clear Dohyun came from very abusive background so it's understandable he could also not even recognize such signs.

And I think him feelings disgusted was mixed of these two things. Internalized homophobia and the reason from the comment.

So I just finished reading this and I still think they were both manipulative to each other and as bad as each other by no means am I justifying anything just saying they both did it to eachother and I find that sungho was more manipulated in high school, I mean look at his mental state.

I agree with this I interpretation of the story.

"You can see in chapter 46 he actually tells Sungho to knock it off and not get so close and personal because he has feelings for Sungho and doesn't want Sungho to mess him around" >> I just binge-read this from the beginning to end then repeat this chapter after reading your comment and he never tells this to Sungho though? He didn't even realize he had feelings for Sungho, he just thought that he liked it when they were together because he felt wanted, and that's why he wanted to stop being close with him because he thought Sungho would leave him anyway. And Dohyun went along with his invitation because of that very reason. He was so deprived of love that he couldn't resist being wanted. And I also never said Dohyun manipulated Sungho since the beginning, it was only after Sungho's invitation that he slowly got addicted to being needed and started trying to make Sungho more desperate for him.

I never try to justify what Sungho did later, I just wanted to say that Sungho didn't manipulate Dohyun in high school.

I'm sorry, maybe I chose the wrong words since I'm not native in English, what I mean is Dohyun's mind is filled with his own self that he couldn't see others, and I understand why he was like that. That's why I said what happened to them in the past was also the fault of people around them who caused them to become that way, and that includes Dohyun's family. But that doesn't make that statement wrong, because Dohyun is indeed like that.

Lastly I never find Sungho stating or thinking that he got disturbed by them being men, or hated it. Maybe a little bit hesitation in the beginning, but that's it. It doesn't make him homophobic, it's natural to feel that way. Even some gays might get confused and anxious at first when they realize they like the same gender. Homophobia is a big word, please don't just use it easily.

I wouldn't say they are as bad as each other but ok.

Firstly I think you don't understand the conception of internalized homophobia. It doesn't have to be drastic. I would recommend to read more about the topic.
It's like many women are internalized misogynistic.

Also it was on the verge of manipulating. He knew that he will keep him around if he would keep their relationship sexual.

What's more the first comment wasn't mine. I repost it because I kinda agree with it. I myself am not really passionate or impressed with the story. I read it long time ago. The ending and last chapters were rather sloppy and the ending naive and disappointing.

And I was talking also about him calling their relationship when they were caught or at least sexual intercourse disgusting.

The bigger red flag was the mc having no agency. Anything about her revolved around him, the guy who was feeding her her insecurities. That kind of relationship is emotionally toxic for both parties. She needs to love herself more, and he does not respect the person he "likes".

I think pansexual would fit better because I get the feeling that he likes people for who they are.

Yeah I think he's pansexual too. That makes more sense then bi.

Yeah but here he liked her when she was a guy and will even when she’s a girl so pan would make sense

Oh yeah ofc

Thanks for the info