
Chapter 39 hits a bit too hard after bawling my eyes out and my mother saying she doesn't care about my tears so I should try to cry harder because it doesn't matter

Your feelings are valid without needing anyone to say so. Your pain doesn't stop being real just because one person wants to belittle your experiences. A family member acting cruel means basically nothing about you or your worth, and it's not your fault if they aren't capable of seeing it. It doesn't matter if it's a parent or a lover or a stranger- they don't get to decide anything about you as a person.
If someone can't tell the difference between gold or plastic, does the gold become less valuable? No.
I know my kids are gold... and I can tell you are, too. Other people will see it. Your mom can't see the treasure in front of her, but that doesn't reflect on you. That's her problem.
You're entirely valid in your own right.

Yiyoung ur expressions doesn't help do you like it or not???? Is the author deliberately doing this or what

I'm not in author-nim's head but in my two cents opinion I just think author just want to show that Yiyoung kinda like when Kang's mean to him, it has the vibe of the BDSM but obviously without beeing BDSM (no safe word etc...) but even in the main story his vibe was really submissive to Kang, and he clearly love when he's mean (love it even)... what I want to say is that author wants Yiyoung to be submissive and Kang to be mean but I think she's doing it the wrong way ? Idk if I make sense but that's my opinion (maybe I'm wrong and she likes dubious content idk)

Oh, and for the "he's trying to run away" part, maybe it's just me, but beeing used to this couple and obviously the story beeing pretty green flag for most when I personnally saw him run away I was honestly thinking "oh, he's running away because the pleasure's too intense and the big schlong's arriving" That's my honest thought ! But maybe you are right and like I said it's more dubious ? Which would be sad regarding the fact that the story was pretty green flag... would ruin everything but well.
MC got himself involved in some freaky guild