Willow's Topics (1147)

I think the dislike (well, in my case at least) comes more on the fact that she meddled on something and took actual actions (giving ml his number to dating sites/counselors) rather than her having an ignorant/uneducated opinion against the queer community. She's fortunate the couple in this story would def act mature about it. But what if it involves someone who is emotionally sensitive or fragile? Or imagine if some girl or his ex actually saw it and starts coming to the ml? There's a big difference between hating or disliking something due to ignorance then simply voicing them out (being vocally homophobic) VERSUS taking matters on your own hands by actually acting so rashly on a topic you don't even know about. Actions, even by mistake or out of ignorance, may come with consequences to the person to whom it is directed to. And it'll be the person affected and not the girl who will have to fix things. As a third person seeing all that happen, it's frustrating.

However, I do agree that hating on her and calling her names are too excessive given that she acted out of concern rather than w/ malice or hate. Irl, it might make her hateful or closed-minded, or even scared to make an opinion at all. But it's just sad and frustrating to see her act so rashly here. I'm at least glad mc and ml are mature here and that the author wouldn't do too much of a drama on her acts as this story does not seem to lean on very heavy dramas.

SIDENOTE tho, I'd like to point out a positive fact that even while being ignorant, at least she did not go around outing the couple to everyone given that their community seems to be a more conservative one. Goes to show she wasn't malicious or hateful. Just... made some poor decisions.

That's all! (⌒▽⌒)

Yes! Thank you!!
I totally agree with what you said
I know she's made a huge mistake and I know that the couple have every right to be angry
But this is a perfect opportunity to educate her as you see she's feeling kinda guilty already
I just feel that people in the comments are way too cruel to her because it's their fav couple
But these things happen in real life all the time (well, at least in most countries) and you can't get mad every time
As the queer community, this was always our goal to be accepted and educate people about ourselves, so we can't lash out at everyone who is in the wrong
We need to prioritize educating them if possible

I live in a very conservative country (much more than south Korea) and I remember my sister frowning and flinching every time she saw any sign of homosexuality. It was like that until a very nice gay guy entered their friend group and instead of getting angry, he took his time to educate them over the years. Now she's the only person in my family that I came out to. And she's been very kind and supportive, just because someone was kind enough to teach her

literally yes to all of that. thank u because everyone else here is acting like she needs to be burned at the stake or smth. what she's done is wrong, yes, but she's also young and can learn from this, and seems to be feeling guilt/regret as it is. it's also obvious she's dealing with a lot in her personal life and with it hinting at possibly being queer herself, especially with her coming home from Seoul(?) bc smth potentially happened there. at least it seems like smth happened and its not just a break to take care of her grandma. maybe I sympathize with her more because I'm around her age, and, even tho I was a bit younger then, I've done foolish and/or irresponsible things because I've gotten stuck in my own head about certain things and let internalized feelings control me.

as a queer person too, who grew up in a rural area, albeit a rural area in a progressive country (its still largely bigoted however), I've seen people say queerphobic things and sometimes it's maliciously, and sometimes it's simply ignorance. I think mi-ok is definitely on the ignorant side if anything. some people are horribly bigoted, and no amount of trying to get them to understand will change that, but that's definitely not the case with this girl and yes I think she should apologize and admit to her wrongdoings, but getting angry or accusing her of things won't help even a little. it'll either ruin her relationship with haebeom or maybe even make her double down, or both. reacting to ignorance/hate with hate/anger never ever makes the situation better. we should always try to teach people so they can understand us queer people better whenever we can. and knowing beom and ho, they're gonna do just that in the next chapter, and I'm sure it'll be resolved just like that.

on a slightly more personal note (I ramble a lot but I swear it's relevant, you dont have to read it tho lol, my main points are above and below this one), I'd also like to add that yes what she did was incredibly invasive and as such wrong, but as someone who also grew up in a rural area like her, and was raised somewhat by my grandma, while I wasn't outright taught bigoted views, I also wasn't taught to be thoughtful or open-minded, just to be kind and help people out when I can. I had to teach the rest to myself, and if all my friends weren't also queer, that could've been a lot harder and I might have had way more internalized homophobia. also out there in the countryside, you kinda know everyone. all your friend's older siblings are friends. all your parents are friends, you know everyone's first names and last names and generally where they live. I imagine in an even smaller, tightly knit village, that's increased tenfold. my best friend is like a sister to me, we've known each other our whole lives, and I wouldn't hesitate in trying to hook her up with someone if I thought she'd like them (obviously I'd ask her first, out of respect), or help her out with dating site or wtv if she was looking for a relationship. based on their interactions, it seems like mi-ok and haebeom are very close and have a sibling-esque relationship, yes giving someone's number out is bad, but I feel like if you look at it like she's a meddling younger sister who wants her big brother to be happy, and worries for him, and has been taught that what he's doing is bad, it makes it a little easier to understand her actions, doesn't make it right, just easier to understand. I have an older brother myself, by about two years, and he's not as social as I am, nor is he as motivated in life, keeps to himself a lot, I know he still lives at home because he's worried about leaving our mom alone(I too felt awful when I had to move out for school), rather than seeking out and chasing his dreams. so I worry about him quite a bit, I want him to thrive and do things for himself, so if I saw an opportunity where I think it would help him, I'd dive for it so fast, maybe even without considering the repercussions or how he'd feel just because I want the best for him. I reckon its the same for mi-ok, with an extra bit of trauma perhaps (the things she's been saying when the story focuses on her are very reminiscent of perhaps seeing a queer couple get outed, and are persecuted by their peers, all of the things she thinks being less like "that's wrong" or "that's abnormal" and more akin to "that's not what society expects so you shouldn't be doing that")

with all that said (accidental essay, sorry T-T), at the end of the day this is fiction, these people aren't real and you can say whatever you want about them, have whatever opinions you want and never analyse it any deeper if you don't want to, though I think it does this author, and particularly this story, a disservice (I felt the same about the complaining during the second season of Love in Orbit, I find that story incredibly well written and deep, but maybe that's just me lol). I think this is one of those stories where the nuance of the characters and plot are a little deeper and more stretched out, which can be hard to keep up with on a weekly basis (my one friend who also reads this always forgets everything immediately), so it's easy to forget when a single line is dropped that can hint to smth deeper. people can hate mi-ok and get angry at her as much as they want, though I disagree with it, because it's fiction, but I hope those sorts of behaviours and reactions don't carry over into real life. our world kinda sucks all over right now, and obviously aside from trauma/criminal related things, when possible we should try to always be as understanding as we can. you're more likely to expand someone's worldview and help them be open-minded if you talk to them kindly and reasonably. especially when it comes to kids/younger people.

ONG