
Spoilers and theory....
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What if SH care for Jiwha but can't get himself to like him because Jiwha is the one who intentionally or accidentally... Idk... Outed him to his family? Or reveal some secrets related to his sexuality or his first love/crush. Which started this whole snowball of his father abusing him...
That is why he keep on warning him not to cross the line throughout the story?!
Other than maybe having the lack of chemistry, I feel like SH reaction towards jiwga says something more.

Yeah good point. Seems like their sexuality was found out by others at the same time, so Jihwa either did something, or they were seen by someone, and SH blames it on Jihwa?SH may not be romantically interested in Jihwa now, but if his sexuality was found at the age of 13, we can only assume Jihwa was his first... boyfriend/crush?? If Jihwa is at fault for all of the trauma SH went through, then he was really hurt by not only his father/family, but also his first love at the same time..

Yeah the doctor said SH was fine when he first met him, then later on only he is locked at home after they realised the disease is contagious and involved jiwha. So something must have changed there, probably triggered by jiwha. Then, the 2nd time after SH was locked, the doctor see him and saw that he is not okay.

So a big clue here in chap 55..."the way you look at him, is not the way you look at me, and this feels me with rage, as if I am back towards that time"...So... what if like SH's dad favours his younger brother all these while? That's why he feels like he is always yearning for his father's attention. Plus, it also explains why he is so smart yet hiding his talents and living a life of waste. He once tried his best to be the best son, but it did not change anything, something along the lines... Perhaps his mother is of lower status, or his mother is not of his dad's favour, so his dad favour his younger brother over him?
To get his father's attention and love, perhaps his mom is dead since young, he is willing to do anything his father requested, including sleeping with nobles and various other dirty tricks. His dad must have always lied that he is doing a good job by sacrificing for the family, while deep down SH knows his dad loves his younger brother more. He seen through his father's facade. Yet he still lies to himself, his father really loved him. Anyways, one major clue here can be seen from when he sent the sexual paintings to his father, somehow meaning his dad is the cause of him falling into a life of lust?
Then after doing everything for the family, he thought he could get the love he always wanted, but his father used his homosexuality, as a reason to cut of his top knot and in addition to that betrayed him by making him the head of the house so that he will be the scapegoat for him during the Royal trails? Basically sending him to his death...
This the theory I've formed aside from building upon some of the other theories from the other readers.
I don't think he ever loved a servant, cause the attitude he has when he approached nakyum doesn't seem like he has ever fell for someone who is not a noble.
He said he does not like bearded old men, another indicator he might be involved with them through his father.
What do you guys think?? Theories?
Not only did he stereotype gay people, the shitty cousin also outed him without his permission!