the moment i saw donald na, i was already intrigued. his character design was absolutely perfect. i got intimidated when i saw him. it’s amazing how he had an effect which he desperately wanted people to feel. to be seen as strong, someone who instilled fear. he was an enigma. i could not understand what drove him. but as the story progressed, it became evident that it was obsession. when i found out that the reason on the last chapters, i completely broke down.
he was just a child. even until now. he’s 18 in korean age but technically, he’s just 17. not even an adult. he was just someone who desperately tried to escape his shitty environment. he saw how cruel the world is at a young age. he was just trying to survive.
i can never hate him because he is like a mirror of gray, my favorite character. they both lost someone who was their motivation and ended up fighting to change their situation. the only difference is, gray was able to find a new support system, and donald didn’t. gray was able to find friends who are likeminded and are on the same “level” as him. heck, he even had ben who he looked up to. donald had confidants and subordinates. but he’s still someone being looked up to. his position was on top, which is really lonely on its own. even when he was surrounded by many people, it’s just like before, he had to shoulder the responsibility. i’d like to think that donald na’s fate would be like gray’s if he was alone.
i’m really sad because since his life was lonely- a stray dog, he only knew one thing. to keep on going. no one to teach him how to not succumb to it. that’s why his motivation- his obsession lead to his end. he wanted to be strong, and he was able to do so, but people thought he’s different from everyone. he’s someone they could not reach. thus, he kept on going through that lonely road. he could not stop anymore. he needed someone to stop him. he wanted it to be gray who was similar to him, someone who could have understood him.
it’s really bittersweet but i am actually glad that he was able to maintain the image he worked hard for. unbeatable.
rest in peace donald na, you’re an amazing character.
i am so tired of seeing people solely blaming henry. ALL of them were selfish. the thing is, my favorite character is seth. because ironically, despite being the youngest among them, he was the most mature. why? because he faced the situation he put himself into, albeit through call. so can we please stop hating one sidedly? seth knew what he was getting into. he literally told henry that he didn’t care even though he was told EARLY ON that henry loves sam. it was a moth in a flame situation. he said and did things but in the end, he couldn’t handle it. he [couldn’t] not care. it’s truly devastating because i felt for him so much. his only fault was loving a person genuinely. if i’m being honest, i’m glad that they didn’t end up together. because it will never get easier afterwards. henry still has an attachment to sam, and even his family. even if let’s say henry moved on completely, realistically speaking, seth will have a hard time. he WILL get insecure. he was told (by henry’s friend) about who sam is in henry’s life and even witnessed their special connection. it’s hard forgetting, and i don’t think henry is the perfect person to reassure someone.
sam isn’t my favorite, but please give this man some credit too. he is “dumb”, like henry said, which makes him a good match for henry. sam KNOWS how he feels. even though he’s a bit slow in realizing, he doesn’t run away from it. he makes henry face it. but yes, sam is also selfish. he got really entitled and even blamed henry when he’s the one who didn’t act on his feelings before.
and lastly, i’d like to talk about henry. this man is an avoidant. his past wasn’t exactly good. he grew up just staying silent, to avoid conflicts. he even witnessed at an early age how love between two people can go bad. i’m not saying that everyone who experienced the same thing ends up like him, but i do understand why he became like that. he is a pessimist, a cynic. for someone who likes to avoid anything related to feelings, the whole situation was confusing. he DID try with seth. he wanted it to be real with him. but let’s be real. since everything he did with his feelings was avoid it, there was never any progress. it will always stay there. i really felt how realistic that is. that irl, there’s always going to be seths and henrys. that no matter how sincere a person is, if they’re entangled with someone who hasn’t done anything with their problems before them, and just learned how to live in it, it will never work out. it will only be a series of misunderstandings and conflicts.
this was a beautiful read.
Period you voiced my thoughts
i like how even though ryo loved zen before, he never went easy on him. he genuinely viewed him as a rival, someone who motivates him to do better. i also love how there’s no unnecessary characters to make each other jealous. they’re so idiots in love coded. 5 stars!
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