I am lost
TLDR
Jonak set a mission to island of the dragon to ask the dragon for help due to increasing cases of abduction of women by the Orcs species wherein they were used as surrogates for reproduction. He also did this to protect Isle, his only childhood friend and the one he loves
Jonak sailed for 3 years before he arrived in island of the dragon. Adain found Jonak unconscious and brought him to his castle/house. When Joank regained consciousness, he explained to Adain why he came and Adain agreed in the conditioner that he'll become his mate.
Jonak and Adain flew to Jonak's village and found Ilse is now married to Bernard thus breaking her promise to wait for Jonak. Jonak acted rude to ease Ilse guilt and make her think that it's a good thing he didn't wait for him. Jonak and Adain burned the Orcs den and rescued the captive women. Ilse see through Jonak act and apologize for breaking her promise. Jonak and Ilse parted ways
Jonak and Adain still investigates the case of Orcs abducting women for reproduction with the help of Adain's brother, Luscious. Adain started teaching Jonak to read and write. Jonak opened about his past when he was an outcast after witnessing the abuse of children in the hands priest of their village. Adain felt guilty and did not sleep beside Jonak.
Time passes and Jonak is fishing when an Orc is drowning. He tried to save it and Adain came and help the Orc. As a thank you, Orcs explained why they abduct women for reproduction. They now have a lead to the case.
Jonak and Adain received a letter from Bernard stating that Ilse is dead. Adain was shocked and thought it was because of Orcs but Jonak clarified that it is because of old age and Ilse actually has grandchildren already. They are immortals so the lost sense of time. They traveled to Jonak's village to visit Ilse gave
I quite enjoy the story, if you leave aside the rape which is enough for me to hate this tbh (I have mixed feelings about) but if I think of this as fiction only, then it’s fine, I don’t have to get my emotions and morals involved (this chapter was hard to read so I scrolled and tried to read only the important stuff for me to follow the story)
I love how everyone agrees that none of this excuses his behavior, but honestly I only have compassion for animals and children, so I’m kind of ashamed to admit this works on me :( not because it justifies anything but because it’s genuinely sad. Of course that only applies for the baby version, the adult version needs to go to jail.
Also, I think someone mentioned it in the comments, and agree, that this is probably just to give some background or explain how he ended up like this, not to excuse or justify anything. (And just to be clear, nothing justifies rape, nothing, not trauma, not a sad backstory, so we still hating on him, but we can still be sad for the baby)
I am on chapter 20, the read is too painful and frustrating. Don't get me wrong, I love it, I wouldn't get past chapter 10 if I didn't. But please can someone tell me if Lister is dead or at least getting what he deserves (Death), and what was the original deal with is sister, what's wrong with the medicine (Please don't answer me just to tell me that I should just read and it's worth it, my brain is tired)
Trying to only answer the questions you asked and not give away more
Lister is not dead
We still don’t explicitly know what they deal was with the sister but she is involved in the incident that lead sylhan to become like this
We don’t outright know what’s wrong with the medicine but it’s heavily implied that it caused negative symptoms and made memory loss worse











I love reading but they talk more than my mom, and I love her, but my point is she talks a lot