
It's like a room and the decor. A crapily guilty room with narcism might look nice with some color coordinated curtains and a fresh coat of paint but stay inside it long enough and you'll smell the rot. A nicely built room with out of date furniture and a popcorn ceiling might me off-putting but you want to stay inside because you feel safe and at home. There is nothing wrong with making what people first pay attention to more appealing, but personality is what makes people choose to stay or leave at the end. Both are important. It's foolish to only pay attention to one.
Struggle more. The more you struggle the sweeter the end.