I'm sorry but even after seeing her backstory I still find Saena's behavior disgusting and inexcusable. If the time to have an abortion passed and she was entirely convinced she would wind up hurting Kyoko at some point (which she must have thought since she herself admitted that she sent her away to the Fuwa's to protect her), why would she continue to raise her only to psychologically, emotionally, and almost physically torment her for years on end? Why didn't she leave her with the Fuwa's or some other friends earlier, put her up for adoption, give her to a family member, leave her at an orphanage, etc...? Abortion or keep a child she hated weren't the only options she had. If she was going to keep Kyoko she could've faked it instead of almost going out of her way to act like she hated her just for existing. I didn't sympathize with her before and I definitely don't now.
I totally agree with you （￣へ￣）
I would actually disagree with you. The role of pride and shame are so integrated with Japanese culture and their mindset, that I find her actions completely understandable and forgivable. There was no mention about her parents, so I would assume she had no family support, and pushing her mistake onto a friend would be extremely shameful. She hated herself so much, she was willing to commit SUICIDE as a way out. Reading this last chapter made my heart cry for Saena, and perfectly illustrates why I'm pro-choice aha. I don't know much about the Japanese adoption methods, but I know in normal cases, there aren't severed ties between the birth family and the child. Also, if the American foster care program is anything to go by, it's not exactly the best option. Just my two cents (▰˘◡˘▰) lots of love
So it's better that she preserve her reputation and scar a child for life than suck it up and do something else about her? Like I said, it's not like she didn't think Kyoko was in danger in her care and not like she didn't realize she would hate her when she was born, so what would she have done if she decided to up and drown her as a kid or smother her in her crib or beat and starve her? Besides, it's not like she didn't wind up "pushing her off on a friend" in the end, so why not do it before the damage was done? There's no way someone as smart as Saena wouldn't realize the effect growing up in a home with a parent who actively despises you would have on her. She made the choice to keep her, so she should've taken care of her. There is absolutely nothing forgivable and understandable about the way she treated her.
It's true that Saena ignored her, but there wasn't any indication of abuse, was there? Many of the adults around her were making sure she didn't physically hurt her. Kyoko spent all day with children her age, and a couple who helped raise her, so her childhood wasn't that bad? Sure, she was never around, but I grew up with two working parents and can attest that as long as there is someone else there, its not that bad. The only thing I can fault Saena for is the lack of encouragement or interest in Kyoko, and I'm inclined to just shrug my shoulders and say, "ehh, it worked out in the end."
No indication of abuse?Kyoko is a psychological wreck because of the emotional torture her mother put her through. Ignoring is one thing, but her mother was needlessly cruel and cold to her. Saena treated Kyoko like a pariah for years and made her so desperate for love and acceptance that she was willing to throw herself at Sho, who anybody on the outside could see was in insufferable dick, and then said on national TV that she didn't exist. She didn't just lack encouragement either; she made Kyoko feel like no matter what she did it would never be good enough. It got to the point where she had to run off into the forest to go cry because she had no one to turn to despite being a little girl. Kyoko grew up thinking she was an unwanted failure whose mother threw her away because she was worthless. And she didn't grow up with kids her own age; her only male friend was Sho and girls hated her because of it. And even if she did, that doesn't make having a parent who despises you just magically not matter. Just because Saena didn't beat her and Kyoko didn't turn into a prostitute or a serial killer doesn't mean "everything worked out in the end". Who knows how much damage she did to her.
Physical abuse is just one type of child abuse. Neglect and emotional abuse can be just as damaging.
I'm relating to real life situations.
This can happen.
Being pregnant when not wanting to be pregnant, really busy with work so you don't have time to raise a child and most of all, you've been impregnated by a guy you fell head over heals for bit turned out to be a complete dick bag and might have raped her.
Keeping the baby or aborting a baby is the biggest and toughest decision a mom will make.
She wasn't raped. -.- If she wasn't prepared to take care of a child, then she should have used contraception.
The storyline with Kyoko and her mom doesn't make me hopeful, it makes me sad and angry. She so desperately wants even some microscopic amount of affection from this awful woman who projected all of her insecurities on her and treated her like absolute garbage for years and said just a few days ago that she didn't exist. She's never showed Kyoko even the most basic human decency and yet we're supposed to be happy that Saena might possibly not hate her entirely, maybe. You can't just slap a backstory on a terrible character and suddenly make her sympathetic; it has to be proportional to her current actions. If anything, her backstory made things worse because what caused her behavior is WAY too small to be justifiable. You're supposed to want the characters to reconcile and I honestly didn't. I wanted Kyoko to finally tell her mom off and then never see or think about her again. In fact, I still want that, but now it looks like it's never going to happen.
I just hope that we can finally get back to the actual characters and stories we like and care about now that we got that overly long fiasco out of the way.
"way too small" dude different ppl react differently to different situations; dont project ur own attitude on others and claim it as a certain standard
i know someone who has depression and started crying over not having cornflakes u would probably tell her too that she is acting ott over such a "small thing" and that she should suck it up or sth instead of being butthurt about it bcs wtf would u cry over sth so "small" honestly dont talk about what ppl should feel hurt about and what not that just makes u look like a jerk
It sounds like your friend already had a pre-existing mental condition. If she did not, I would most definitely say she was overreacting. Even based on you description it sounds like she needs someone to tell her calmly and nicely that the situation is fine. But Saena did not. She got tricked by a guy she thought liked her and lost a case. She wasn't raped. She wasn't fired. She wasn't abused. She was just too trusting of the wrong person one time. That does not justify emotionally torturing a child for their entire life. So, yes, in this situation I would have told her to just "suck it up".
Besides, even if she had some sort of mental condition, that still doesn't justify her behavior. She should've gotten help instead of taking it out on Kyoko.
you right, whatever saena going through isnt justify her action towards kyoko. but to calling it small matters its too much. she didnt raped, but she got pregnant outside wedlocks, and in asian country thats considered as shame & disgrace, . Even if you getting married after, you will be the talk of the town, thats why most people choose an abortion instead. so imagine saena situation, she getting pregnant, and the man left, she didnt even know his real name or his whereabouts. She did getting fired, the sensei getting fired bcause of her too, and then rumour circle around in the industry really fast so its impossible to find another job when she has such a black record. saena has no family to support or comfort her, her job is her only pride, and she is betraved by someone she love and trusted the most. and you call it small matters? many people suicide just bcause they break up with their lover you know.
Saena's not stupid and she wasn't coerced; she chose to sleep with this guy even though she admitted that she never really knew much about him. If she didn't want to get pregnant she should've used protection or birth control or just not had sex. And this isn't an issue of outside opinion as Saena has never once seemed to care about what other people think of her outside of thinking she doesn't express emotions well. And her career wasn't hurt in the slightest since she seems to be one of the most prominent lawyers in Japan at the moment. She has no leg to stand on here.
Saena maybe smart in academic but when it comes to relationship she has no experience. thats why she thinks of herself as a fool bcause she got blinded by love. well in america the school taught you since early age to use contraception but in asian countries its not like that at all. even sex education sometimes is considered taboo. and using protection and birth control didnt guarented 100% that you wont get pregnant. and there is a case when you madlv in love, you didnt planned to have sex but it all just happened like that, and the next morning you realized you are alreadv naked. even if Saena seem doesnt care on people opinion about her, but she cares a lot about her job, and being a Lawyer, Reputation means a lot. she has a lot of pride from being a lawyer thats stop her from abortion due to expired date or removed kyoko from familv registry. what do you mean her career wasnt hurt in the slightest? The crocodile sensei has to open a new lawfirm so Saena would get a job. do you think it would be easy to get a client when you just blow off a case? Remember when Saena brushed Kyoko hands and say "dont touch it, you destroyed everything you touch, this case I can't afford to failed again in this case". It show Saena work reallv hard to be prominent lawyer she is now. Dont get me wrong. I hate Saena for what she did to kyoko. but I couldnt agree when you call it a small matter. you have no idea what she is been through until it happens to you.
Well, what about Kyoko? She had it much worse than Saena as not only did essentially the same thing happen to her (only worse in my opinion since it went on way longer and Sho didn't even like her at the time or apologize), but she also had to live with and then subsequently be abandoned by her psychologically abusive mother. But she didn't turn into a crazy harpy; she couldn't deal with Sho for a while but she even seems to have gotten over that. Saena's problems are all inside her head. She never got over it and got better like Kyoko did because she CHOSE not to get over it and get better. SHE'S the one who internalized her one failed relationship and never moved on. SHE kept herself in that unhealthy place and took it out on an innocent child instead of getting the help she obviously needed. People make mistakes; sometimes people make HUGE mistakes that seem like the end of the world. But she created all of her own problems after losing that case. People have been bending over backwards to give her second chances and help her move on - a new job, Kyoko continuing to love her no matter how horribly she treats her, Crocodile-sensei supporting her for all these years - and she refuses to accept any of them and get on with her life. She turned a molehill into a mountain and lives in the horrible world that she created for herself almost 2 decades ago. The matter was certainly small and she's the one who blew it way out of proportions and let it ruin her life and almost ruin Kyoko's.