Me: I keep having a dream about a wall. Therapist: Maybe you can walk me through it. Me: [quietly] Holy shit
Should I post a wanted poster?
I'm really scared.....is it stuck?
Recently I came out, and as a gift, my best friends took me to a sex store and bought me a lot of toys. So when I came back from college on spring break, I stayed at my father's house. One day while everyone was away I decided to whip out my new dildo; I was totally in my own world, and didn't hear my father open the front door to the house. But so......
My best friend told me that one time he got home from school, thinking he beat everyone home, and decided it was a good time to log into his favorite porn site to jerk off. He said he was too busy "violently cumming" to hear when his dad walked into the room. His dad cleared his throat and my friend made eye contact with him, penis in hand. My bes......
They’re always popping up at inopportune times and they deserve a good beating.
A friend of a friend said a girl at her school masturbated using a peeled banana and had to scoop it out using a tablespoon.
There was a rumor at my high school that if a guy drank enough Mountain Dew, his sperm count would drop to zero. Let's just say, my backwoods school ended up with a high pregnancy rate. They had to add the rumor to the sex education curriculum.
My dad walked in on me in high school, and I couldn't get my vibrator to shut off, so I kept talking to cover the humming noises. On another note, I walked in on him in our study watching porn and he couldn't get the remote to change the channel, so I guess we are even.
I don’t know, but they both get harder the more you play with them.
I hit up my fuckboy and ended up agreeing to stay the night with him since we had the place to ourselves. We fooled around for a bit, but we end up passing out. Fast-forward to the morning: I wake up alone, thinking he went to work. I start jerking off and enjoying myself, not insanely loud. Just as I'm about to come, I hear him walk by the door an......
So one day I decided to try something a little different. I figured looking at some naughty stuff on a bigger screen would make for a better experience. So, I used the internet browser on the Wii in my living room to do just that, while my parents were out of the house. I was going at it fully naked, because why not? And then, suddenly, I heard foo......
I was really drunk one night at a friend’s house. He was asleep, and his mom had gone to work (night shift). Well, I’m laying on the couch, and I grab my laptop to look at some porn. Next thing I know, it’s morning. I had fallen asleep before doing anything. My laptop is on the coffee table, with the lid closed. I think nothing about it. Then......
13 02,2021
The husband decided to make his password “my dick,” but his wife fell on the floor laughing. The computer said the password was too short.
Then the librarian told me to take it out.