
It seems that Ian's mom initially devoted all her energy to her relationship with her husband. After he passed away, she struggled to cope and went into a downward spiral. However, after the show, she recognized that she could focus all her attention on Ian's reputation, causing her to shift from one extreme to another. She is going to spiral when he relocates to a far-away college.
They always explain away the lack of affection with, “I'm not the type to do/say that so easily”… He is your partner, your childhood friend, your HS sweetheart, you know how he would respond. If you don't say or be affectionate with him who else would you act that way towards? The seme was so present and responsive with the uke even when he was busy job hunting as well. They were in the same boat so the ukes excuse doesn't seem all that compelling.