Nikki's Topics (1180)

OMG I. THATS WT CAME TO MY MIND TO LOL
I WAS GONNA WRITE YAY AND POST

well, not THAT rude. but he did come from the battlefield so he's a hell of a lot more cautious than normal people. so it's understandable honestly.

But he does know her. She's not a stranger. Still I guess it was due to his habits formed due to the wars or something. Or maybe due to his spirit.

According to spoilers.....







Everyone believes his spirit to the spirit of death (its really time), so people refuse to even go near him, much less eat anything he has passed by close enough (it'd be worse if he were to touch it, but either way they'd be afraid to touch the food and throw it away, which is why if you go back to the banquet, you'll see that he stayed far away from where the food is at), and they'd wouldn't want to touch anything he has touched and would throw it away (like the food).

And NO ONE touches him, bc think that they would like either die on the spot or be cursed or something (this is partly bc he can touch someone and kill them, but that's bc he accelerated the rate in which they would have lived (he sped up their lifespan very quickly basically), but he can control this extremely well).

Even his whole family, as well the staff and anyone else who could be staying in his household, treat him like this, if not worse, once he had his spirit summoning ceremony and they learned what spirit he had summoned.

I think Alex is probably the only who probably touches him (though I imagine being the crown prince it would freak people out if he did this in public), but guys don't seem that physical in the society this novel takes place in.

So means that he literally hasn't had anyone touch him in YEARS and if someone had on accident (like brush into him or something), they would have reacted EXTREMELY NEGATIVELY.

This is why when the MC touched him, especially when he had his back to her and wasn't expecting it (as well as just coming back from war, so that's more PTSD there for Karnov who is legitimately a child solider), he freaks the fuck out and lashed out.

I mean, even without all of this, I know there was several years when I was younger that if someone came up behind me, especially if I hadn't noticed them (sometimes I would had still reacted even I knew they were there), and they touched my back or my sides, I would have either shrieked or immediately start moving to hit whoever it was (I got better at stopping or slowly down my swing, more so if the person was right behind me, but if they were next me they were screwed bc I couldn't recover in time (my sister may or may not have gotten a handprint on her face one time)) or both. So I get the feeling of just reacting without realizing or having enough time to even stop yourself from hitting a person on accident, it can be really upsetting.
(When this did happen my teachers just shrugged it off once they saw it was me, bc they had more important things to deal with like the actually fights that happened every week.)

They just met like what a week or 2 days ago?
So not really. Anyone could get startled and push someone, especially if they come from war like you said. But it didn't look like he pushed her hard so I guess that's why I think it's fair enough. ╮(￣▽￣)╭

Guess it just depends on the person. Cause I'm not twitchy at all HAHAHAHAHAHA! When someone touches me, I'd just look to see who it is. Depending on the environment too, since there are places where I'm comfortable and is a private space. Like my house, a relative's house, classroom, etc. Ironically, even though I'm not twitchy, I HATE being touched... I just it as hard as I can lol. (although there are people I openly no to)

BTW, the MC's spirit now makes sense with his whole "Give him your food" XD

I just tolerate it as hard as I can*

I'm like 50/50 on physical contact and it depends very much on how well I know someone. But I'm not as twitchy another as you put it , though that's probably bc in middle school my friends made a game out of it to see who can get the bigger reaction (which is why the teachers just ignored it when they saw that it was me), and like I just gradually got more used it and/or holding back my reaction, like having a better reaction time in stopping myself from slapping someone accidently.
I wasn't that bothered, mainly bc I no idea why I reacted like that, especially bc when I was younger than that I didn't have the same reaction (honestly I only realized why like a week or two ago and long short short, being the youngest sibling, your older siblings are more inclined to scare the shit out of you). I mainly feel bad that one time I almost elbowed my nephew in the head when he was like 2, bc he came up behind me and touched me, startling me, but he was far enough behind me that I was able to stop in time.

growing up being scared almost all the time? makes absolute sense why you end up almost hitting people when they surprise you

I'm an only child so I can't relate

I have like 4 (technically 6 but that's a long story ) older siblings, with 2 I mainly growing up with though, so I had to be on the defensive like 24/7

Sometimes I wonder what it's like being an only child, but its hard to imagine

Though my dad likes to jumpscare us sometimes too, and that's part of the reason why my mom didn't like taking us out to restaurants. I think it helps that my sisters and me who live at home have been volunteering at a haunted attraction in the fall for the past few years, so that probably gets some of our urges to scare each other out

If you're wondering well it really depends on the person. Some people like being an only child, some people wanted siblings... I'm the latter :')

I want to talk about topics I can't talk to about with my parents and stuff like that HAHAHAHAHAHA! I do have someone who's as close as a sister to me, she's my younger cousin. But we don't really get to see each other personally, usually just talk online because we live far away from each other. An advantage with being an only child though, you're the favourite one. I also tend to be pampered by my grandparents lol. But since you're both the oldest and the youngest, it's kind of double the pressure with what you're gonna be doing with your life. But I'm sure that's not just hard on people that are only childs (I was contemplating writing children... but that just sounds wrong). But it's not that they pressure me, it's just that I'm really unmotivated to do anything so I just half-ass stuff I do, which in turn makes me feel guilty. Cause it's stabbing my consciousness when my parents work hard for me and I fool around (∩´﹏`∩)

Ah, I feel that. Honestly, I wish I was closer to my siblings like I was when we were younger and while we would do a lot for each other and we would protect each other, it feels like we're growing apart (especially the 2 at home) and they've been starting to fight like a good majority of my mom's side of the family, so its just stressful. I love the times when we do get along, especially now.

I do and I don't have as much stress/guilt about doing well.and succeeding in my family. My siblings have done a lot of shit, mainly my half-brother and my oldest sister at home (though my half-sister is more like one of those cousins you barely talk to), so like it isn't hard to do much better. But having the pressure of being the "smart one" or the "talented one" is really hard, and it wasn't my parents comparing us, but the rest of our family and I really hate it. Then I got sick in high school and it was just... hard to cope and my grades became shit and I barely passed through school, instead of pressure it was just guilt. I'm the second one of my siblings to be going to college (my half-sister being the first) and I'm trying (barely succeeding at times, but hey, I'm getting it done at least).

Like my parents have tried really hard to give all us the best life that they could and fought for us a lot, I want to be able to eventually give back to them when I'm able too. Honestly, I wish I could turn that guilty feeling into a punching bag and hit it

Honestly, the reason why I don't try hard is exactly because of the pressure of 'being smart'. I have a reputation in class where I get high scores without studying extensively. The only time I study is when the whole class studies just before the exam. I'm just the type of person who doesn't try so I have something to blame. Or so I won't have any expectations or won't get disappointed about something. But once I started senior high with online class, I realized that I can't half-ass it anymore.

Really though, even though you did barely pass, what matters is you did pass. And you'll continue succeeding just as long as you put your mind to it and persevere! Easier said than done, but it doesn't mean it's impossible.

I feel that, I didn't study very much until I had to do online classes too. My main problem was just turning stuff in and showing up in high school . Math is main thing that ever gave me problems and studying never helped with it, but as long as I pass, I pass.

Honestly the one thing I learned from having to more from the harder classes to the easier ones is that they're so much more fun and are far less stressful, my classmates tended to be really funny too, and you actually had days were you told draw or write poems or just watch whatever movie the teacher had on.
The harder ones were so pressed for time in order to get everything they were suppose to teach in, as well as how much more work you had to do, only for a test at the end that maybe a quarter of the class would be able to get high enough grades that they might be able to use for some colleges.
So, that was like one thing I enjoyed about the whole thing that was a bit surprising to me at first. We all got the same degree in the end.

Thank you! I have to keep telling myself this.

Hopefully in-person school is able to start soon, so that you can be back in the type of environment for learning that you enjoy more and learn the best in.

Noo, thank you for sharing that! I really relate with the movies though, just before the pandemic started, we already finished exams because we were a graduationg class. So all we did in the class was sleep or watch a movie or play with our phones or laptops. But yessss, I really hope F2F classes will come back soon. Cause some people just learn differently. I usually learn through my auditory senses. So doing modules really isn't my strong suit. I tend to remember details that I hear from the teachers themselves. Anywayyy, thank you for understanding! Not everyone gets it the way you do!

Ah, it's no problem! I'm not sure what's it's going to be like when I actually take college classes on campus and which way is going to be easier, but I think that I'll just have to see. At the very least I can make some friends hopefully, even if that type of learning turns out to not work as well as online learning. I know how my college does it is different from how public schools do it. I tend to be more of visual learner though. I'm glad that you can understand too! Thank you for talking with me

No problem! Anytime~

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