Update: Okay I finished, it does get better toward the end. No shade, there's nothing particularly bad about it at any point, I think it's just not the kind of smut I really like. Love the story though.
I'm about 1/4 of the way through and for real for real, the sex is awful? Candy never looks like he's enjoying it, the ML literally saw him hurting and crying during their first time and just thought, "wow, what a pain tolerance! Let's keep jamming my dick in dry!" He somehow does even less prep than the pathetic amount we usually get. Does it get better? Because right now it's just painful to watch and extremely off-putting.
WOW. Okay I think it's so vital that Yui heard it directly from Yuha's mouth, though. If Hyun - or anyone - had tried to talk to him about it, I think he would've instinctually rejected whatever he said out of guilt and brainwashed loyalty to his brother.
Everything else aside, shout-out to ML for spending more than THREE HOURS getting him ready for sex. Most semes use a little spit and their pinky finger before ramming it in. Very noteworthy tbh.
There is no death brutal enough for that shithead of a "father."
I don't think Han-Gun was cheating. I'm sure it'll turn out to have been a friend or a cousin or something. But it was so easy for Won to jump to that conclusion because secretly he's been waiting for it to fall apart. On some level he doesn't believe that Han-Gun's affection or support could be genuine because he's grown up being beaten and belittled by the person who's supposed to care about him the most. It felt too good to be true, so it was easy to believe it really was - to confirm his belief that he doesn't deserve to be happy or loved. Trust issues don't cover it.
Hes like a manifesting fairy or smth
Haruma is adorable but um his “friend” straight up rapes him while he’s sick and out of it and then blackmails him afterward so… ya know, like you do to people you “love.”
Andy and Jio are both such cuties. but for real - one of the biggest tells that most BL is written by straight women is because there is not a gay man (or any flavor of mlm queer) alive who wouldn’t have lube in their own home.
The first couple of chapters would have been enough to send me running if I hadn’t read reviews. But keep going, because this is very much not what it seems like on the surface. There are rough moments in the main story, and the side story in particular was difficult to read to be honest, but not for the usual reasons. What happened was awful but unfortunately believable in context, and actually treated like the trauma it was. Gitae is scrappy as hell and a total badass. ML is interesting - he’s very child-like in some ways, because he actually did grow up in total isolation. But he’s also a zombie-killing machine who would (and kinda did) set the world on fire for Gitae. I really liked the significance of ending the story with Gitae using the camera to take a photo of them happily torching a path back to “paradise.”