
I used to be cool with this manga..then I grew up and realise words like "mom" and "wife" make me super discomfy bc it's upholding heteronormative standards but this is really cute I just wish it would portray an actual gay relationship instead of a straight one in the skin of a gay relationship so cute tho

that's still heteronormative my guy. It could be dad and dad and husband and husband. There's no reason to say husband and wife when talking about 2 men. And what's yuri got. To do with this, it could be heteronormative too. Also the people who created this are straight and most people who read are straight girls. I'm a bisexual guy, who has done his research. So I think I know what I am talking about when talking about hetero norm.

I don't think a fictional world where anyone can get married with anyone and then have babies can be all that heteronormative, no matter which words they use. I'm pretty sure that the actual family dynamics are more important than words like "Mom" or "Dad". If I was in a lesbian couple and my partner had a kid, I wouldn't mind being called Dad. Sure they could use word "partner" when talking of each other.
This manga is really wholesome and sweet. It depicts a fairly healthy relationship between the two parents, and the family as a whole is simply adorable. I wouldn't call it "a straight relationship in the skin of a gay one" just because of the words they use. If you take issue with them not being "masculine" or "realistic gay" enough, we could have a discussion about it. There are many yaois where one of the guys acts in a way that is fairly typical for a traditional shoujo heroine. This is not one of those.
Also I'm a bi girl and I've read gender studies at university level, if we need credentials to discuss Omegaverse manga.

+ as you said yourself, this is a sexual fantasy for girls. The point of yaoi is, more than depicting a realistic gay relationship, to exist as a fantasy. Like romantic and erotic stories in general, it's intended to excite. It's technically good if the relationships (whether straight, gay, lesbian or other) in stories we read are healthy and ideal, but some people just feel more titilated by more twisted stories. We go deeper in the realm of fantasy with omegaverse, which has the added fantastical elements of alphas, betas, omegas, pheromones, fated partners and mpregs. "Annoying" and "damaging" are words that can be used to describe pretty much any form of erotic fiction, and definitely omegaverse as a whole. So while it is important to have these discussions, you are making a big deal out of it.

honestly does homophobia not exist in these worlds or something lol???? It's weird how the girl immediately thinks the two male leads are "together" after seeing them together for like 2 seconds. And for fucks sake can straight ppl stop comparing gay men's feeling to straight girls BC it's not the same and it's fucking annoying

Yep. I guess in some ways it may be speaking well of our own current emotional maturity that we find that girl's mindset so difficult to understand and foreign... I think Lovemaid is probably right; it's just that we weren't shown any scenes of the seme interacting with that girl at all, before her flirting blunder, and that may make her reaction to the whole fiasco look even less understandable at times.
Is most yaoi's so devoid of character that a character making a slightly different choice than you expect is a character change???? How can you tell it's a character change when you don't even know the character. Now this can be considered meta bc it's breaking the expectations of most yaoi readers. Wow, you guys need to do other things lmao