Awww I love this so much ╥﹏╥ I'm just so happy we get to know he's living joyously with his husband now ╥﹏╥ I don't know the pains as I'm not part of lgbtq+ nor have I ever fallen in love, but his past experiences hurt me so much ╥﹏╥ I'm glad that our society is progressing into an environment that's now more friendly towards the lgbtq+ but there's still so much that could be done. Wishing a happy life for everyone out there most importantly, I hope you can find your significant other without lying to yourself and also surround yourself with people who are willing to understand you
Seriously I'm living for the art and the colored covers. Can't wait to read more from the author
Again, if this was given more time, it'd probably become more obvious for the audience that in the middle of it all (starting when Hazuki broke his glasses), Watanabe's affection was already starting to shift to Hazuki for real -> additional evidence when Watanabe was able to continue during sex even when Hazuki's glasses slid off (he put it back on afterwards though). Watanabe putting his glasses back, him denying that he's in love, him being angry and frustrated when his friend pointed out that the reason he got close to Hazuki was that he looked like Yuuki, all of those came across to me as Watanabe trying to deny that he is indeed becoming serious for Hazuki. His friend reiterating that Hazuki was used as replacement and the club guy asking if he was becoming serious probably made him guilty and confused that's why he lashed out. Guilty because he's now becoming serious and realized that he used Hazuki. Confused because he still wasn't sure if he loves Hazuki, cause all the while he just thought he was reliving memories with Yuuki. He wouldn't be angry if he just meant to break it off easily, he wouldn't be so shocked about Hazuki mentioning Yuuki if he didn't feel the guilt.
I've always thought this was how the manga went and when I reread, it just solified this.
Just sharing my insights.
First time encountering DID in BL! I don't know too much about DID so I'm really curious about Yuuta and Tomohisa's situation... It's basically Tomohisa having sex with a "little" and someone he and Yuuki consider to be their child to boot. Wanna ask anyone who's well-versed about DID, does this happen sometimes? Is it normal or is it weird? In the end though I guess it really depends on the parties involved whether they consent to it or not but still I'm curious and also whether if it's considered incest or not... Hm but now I think of it, Tomohisa and Yuuta really isn't blood-related but more like father-son in "bond" so it isn't incest scientifically/biologically? Really wondering if Yuuta sees Tomo romantically or not cause that would change things.
Also Tomo having sex with a little would be considered pedophilic won't it? But I can't say much either cause Tomo didn't know anything in the first place. Err this is so complicated but I really wanna understand.
Not pedophilic because is of an adult, it doesn't really matter than the mind is of a little boy unfortunately
There's another yaoi manga that delves into DID, it's called Adam no Rokkotsu. It's incomplete though but highly suggested.
Thank you for the recommendation! I think I've passed by that before and tried to read but didn't continue. I'll check it out some time!
Ahh I see, I thought it would work like that still. Thanks for letting me know
I didn't really read all of your comment (sorry) I just saw the part about the first time encountering DID in yaoi. I do know a bit about DID (psychology major in uni) and I don't really think that's DID portrayed in the manga, and if it is then I'm sorry to say that the author doesn't know much about DID. It is a disorder that occurs due to repeated trauma during childhood (it could be possible that the alter was created during his childhood but no info about that was given). And in thus case if it was in fact a child alter then that is in fact a child and performing any sexual act on it us considered pedophilic even if the body belongs to an adult (also the seme says multiple times that the uke is basically a child but has sex with him anyways so yea just a clarification). Hope that quenched your curiosity.
That depends on the countries, there aren't many countries that consider than pedophilia, and I think that after killing a person they don't really care if it's pedophilia xD
Thank you so much! Your answer really helped me. So DID is only triggered from childhood trauma and can't be from traumas that happen later on in life? I'm just assuming here but Yuuki already probably experienced a lot of trauma from his dad since he was a child and maybe just got a "final" blow when the incident happened... Is that possible that way?
And yeah I had a gut feeling it's pedophilic... But at the same time I don't think Tomo's at fault nor he's considered a pedophile because he didn't even know it was really a child in the first place.
Oh sorry I read your reply again and you did mention about my new question
"it could be possible that the alter was created during his childhood but no info about that was given"
I think he did experience a lot of trauma (especially extreme pressure) from his dad since he grew up that way and he was kinda hinting that it's suffocating to be in their house? I'll just assume it's like that cause that's how I understood it hahaha
Well I'm not denying the hardships he has gone through, but when I say trauma I mean like seriously damaging (and repetitive) trauma like physical/sexual abuse, witnessing murder etc. What happens is that the mind creates this amnesia wall in order to cope with the trauma (because the mind of a child cannot survive with all that pressure). It is essentially a coping mechanism, and this wall of amnesia causes the mind (I guess) to split creating these alters (which develop into their own conscience and become actual people with names and ages of all kinds). That's why its near impossible for an adult to develop this mental disorder, because their minds are developed enough to cope with the trauma without splitting, while in the case of a child their personality isn't fully integrated. So yes he may have that alter from his childhood and it was triggered to come out after he essentially killed his dad but we will never know for sure. (sorry I'm very passionate about this I did a lot of research about it for a presentation I had first year, if you wanna know more feel free to inbox me).
Actually its the same person but just split personalities due to the tragic misfortune that happened to him.... Soo its technically not pedophilic since its the same person but just with a different mindset... Btw this is coming from what i know i dont know if its 100% accurate its just my perspective of how i see it ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶
No, it's fine, don't say sorry. I'm very happy you took time to explain it to me! In fact I should be the one sorry for not really exploring this more. Thank you so much for sharing this knowledge, I've learned a lot.
Also, are you still in uni now? You're doing great! It's really good to be passionate of the field you're taking, I'm slightly envious hahaha more power to you (๑•ㅂ•)و✧
Thank you for sharing your thoughts as well, it's nice to know different people's opinion (▰˘◡˘▰)
The story is interesting but I'm really loving the extras hshhss it just hits my kind of things yknow
I hope, just like If You Hate Me That Much to Love Is An Illusion, we'd get a parallel of them being the bickering high school bffs turn to lovers
Once this masterpiece ends, an anime adaptation is MANDATORY. And please I hope a great studio picks it up. This is more than just BL, and it should be showed to a lot more people. If it's a series of movies, I'd gladly request it to our local cinemas and watch them. This work deserves more attention.
OHH MY GOD... back then I only want an update but now... Anime adaptation would be perfect and from now on I start to dream of it T﹏T
For me that's one of the best works among this kind, so really deserves all of it!!
I guess I'm wishing for too much huh ╥﹏╥ but this really deserves an anime... maybe after it ends after a few more years
Your wish is my wish now lol. But like Banana Fish or Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai etc, now animation companies braver about yaoi and shounen ai, so why not (≧∀≦)
I'm not complaining but I'm doubtful of Saezuru's animation basing from the trailer. So far the recent BL animes' animation that have really caught my attention is Doukyuusei and Given (I love Lerche). Banana Fish was good too, Mappa does well in animating. Then again, just it being animated is a blessing in itself so I won't complain but I hope it's in good hands ;;
Yeah same here I just added Saezuru because the gender. (I think also not gonna like)
Given is great both manga and anime, Sensei's all works are great tho, and Lerche put the cherry on the cream I am getting excited with just a thought of my favs getting animated hahah
I hope one day we meet again under the anime Acid Town comments ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶
No matter how far in the future it'll be, let's definitely meet in the comments under Acid Town anime!!!
I knew all along, since the first few chapters, that Hyoudo definitely is followed by the scent of death. "He's gonna die, he's gonna die". I ingrained that in my head, as if normal, as if it's nothing. Making my head wrap around it to prepare myself, and so I felt like it would not affect me when it comes as I read along the chapters.
And then the Sanada flashbacks happened, and unto Hyoudo and Yukio's story. I was so immersed, absorbed into the beauty of their interconnected fate, how they found each other, that I forgot to remind myself "Hyoudo is probably gonna die". It was just a small attempt to not get hurt but I was still hoping for that slimmer of chance that he would be alive by the end. I'm still hoping but... Chapter 46, the chapter that went as if to engrave his death on stone. It's a death flag, everything was, and I found myself bawling.
I should've known, but I'm still hurt and hurting, hope and hoping. I do think Yukio and Hyoudo together are precious, but more than that, I want Hyoudo to live and be happy. Yukio and Hyoudo, they both are victims of this messed up yakuza world yet stayed genuine and kind along with the others - but they're the only few among the alive ones left, and I want them to stay alive.
Hyoudo, stay healthy. But you probably won't, to make us cry.
I'm still in ch. 34 and I just wanted to put some input before I forget. This manga is so full of lies mixed with some truth that it's hard to grasp implications especially about their emotions.
About Doumoto, I believe he didn't rape Hisako, Hisako wanted to bear his child. It was implied a lot of times that Hisako wanted a chance and that chance came after Fusa died. That "chance" was double-meaning: (1) her wanting a chance to kill Doumoto; and (2) her wanting to love and be loved by Doumoto. Hisako wanting to kill Doumoto wasn't a pretense to seduce him, nor the other way around... Both were true to some extent. I guess Hisako began to fall in love unknowingly when she knew Doumoto sees through her completely, and that feeling heightened when Fusa came to talk about how Doumoto pleasingly looked at and cared about her and Reiji (touching on Doumoto's feelings later on, for now I'll say despite what he said, Doumoto "did" care for them as a father).
Hisako was in denial. She was guilty that she fell in love with her father's murderer. She didn't want Reiji to know cause she knows Reiji loathe(d) Doumoto. When Hisako and Reiji talked in the hospital about her pregnancy, that was the last straw. Hisako thought he disappointed Reiji, while Reiji misunderstood. She thought it was wrong, and a grave mistake to fall in love with Doumoto and thus tried to take her own life. I'm certain Hisako loved Doumoto and that she wasn't raped. Doumoto mentioned about Hisako being a naive little girl thinking he'd marry her if she had his child - for me, that implied that Hisako consented it and even wanted it. The reason Hisako was in distress because she was torn in guilt and in denial, and until the end she didn't realize and/or accept that she did fell in love.
About Doumoto, I'm guessing the reason he took the children in was a mixture of a lot of factors, some I can pinpoint: (1) He was "friends" (or some other kind of rivalry bond) with their father before (Masatsugu mentioned something about Doumoto honoring their "bond" by taking them in); (2) he wanted to die by their, Reiji's and Hisako's, hands.
The first one, people might not believe since Doumoto himself told Masatsugu his intentions but I believe that was Doumoto being fooled by his own lies, being twisted by his own guilty conscience. He saw himself as a guy that did everything cruelly selfishly. That, is not entirely false. He is indeed like that. But how Fusa saw him was also true. Doumoto was fond of the children, and once attached, he'd clutch to them as much as he could. Notice how he did try to treasure them in the subtlest way. He knew he couldn't act all fatherly know, knowing how much evil things he has already done. Yet he isn't entirely correct on how and what he thinks he is. He saved Hyoudo after all... Masatsugu did mention how Doumoto, despite cruel, granted clemency at times and that it came to bite back at him.
The second one especially might be a stretch but I think it's kinda close to the truth. He must've wanted to stop being the head of a "mucked" world already at one point, and I highly think Fusa has a large part on this. And this desire to end everything escalated after Fusa died. He visited Hisako, talked so fondly of Fusa, and showed his vulnerable side. He joked about the poison, but he was serious. He was hinting, and hoping that somehow Hisako will take his life. But as Hisako fell in love, she wasn't able to do it, Doumoto noticed this and thus accepted her - maybe out of sorrow... Did he fall in love with her at one point after that? That, I don't know... Maybe he did cause he did admire Hisako's mom who looked exactly like her... But I can't really tell.
Doumoto purposely tried and successfully enraged Reiji afterwards. It was to incite grudge and revenge against him. He wants to die. This one, I'm not sure, but Doumoto probably knows they plan on destroying everything he built. It's probably his way of repentance after being in the yakuza for too long. Look at how he seemed just like an ordinary old man in the first few chapters, he has mellowed out. And I'm guessing he just wants it to end.
The little details at the end really gives the story a lot more depth, thank you so much scanlators for putting them (⌒▽⌒)
Yes exactly! I appreciate the notes so much :)