hataki's manga / #trauma(84)

oh, my god! that cuts me fucking deep. all but crying just off the first chapter best friends in high school one confessed at graduation was called disgusting. yet, flash forward some 10 years later, they run into each other at the book shop one works at. the other is deep, deep, into the self-hating homophobia to himself. but yet, is still hooking up with violent guys left and right in a form of self-[punishment. the other guy sees this and is just so confused on how the guy called him disgusting is like this now (bruised up and getting banged in the alley) ch. 5 & part of 6: about two guys in the country side. pretty sweet read. guy was a virgin. other was not i just like it

the title actually says it all. they are roommates ended up having sex one night by Chace. then again. and again. and again. was with a married man with a family, as the mistress he put up in a house he paid for. (left off ch. 4) one and done

was raped in school. currently staying home avoiding everything and everything. whiile adventuring by the railroad track, came across a garden. on an older mans property offers to let him help out with the garden and just chill at the house. flinches and or passes out when others get near him or touch him was doing so well. nope. into the newest chapter : betrays his safe place and forces himself onto him. don't read

porn actor / model X camera men been working together for 2 years now. close friends both seemed to of fallen for each other, but don't say it. or uke can only get into it by imagining all the dirty things the camera man is doing to him, instead of his acting partner. was disowned by family for it. prick came around, whom raped him, as a student. while still a virgin at the time. still very much in the closet at the time. camera man / seme has lost his child. was filing scnery by the stream, kid fell in and drowned. wife left him, entire family blamed him. wouldn't touch it for a time. but they both ended up where they are now for their dreams. (they both like their jobs)

were together for a time almost 5 years ago. while he was a prostitute. was meant to be a customer, but he hell first instead. to this sweet, caring, loving guy. not clear, but it seems like he walked away. our uke prostitute went through some things, and almost like trauma, couldn't experience anything sexual. he felt nothing. for those five years, his body reacted no nobody. they met again at the company. where our seme still carried around and treated the ring he gave him as something precious. both still carrying this pain and weight around. both different people than before. but also not. he's living with his brother now, our uke, and he's protective of him being hurt again. they rise over and over again. they are both kind, and caring. to people in general, and to each other. they are good, decent, sweet men. they ended up being able to open up, and move forward.

(up tp ch.7) this kid was abandoned and adopted. he's tried to be the perfect, proper son to them. to repay them for loving and raising them. never being selfish. meanwhile, you got the understanding and kind childhood friend whom lets him be selfish. and grants him anything he wants. listens to his complaints. has sex with him. is able to fall asleep at ease with him. forward jump. adopted kid is already treading atop a thin ass line. wrestling with being into guys, and one childhood friend for instance but it rebels against his "perfect, proper son" portrayal so he just keeps cramming everything down without end. the thing to bust the lid. was the mother saying she was pregnant. he fears being abandoned over their blood child. he's petrified. and just winds up collapsed and in the hospital. where said childhood friend tells them both about all his worries and fears of abandonment. they are good parents and accepted everything and consoled their son. even the part where he admitted they would never be able to meet their grandchildren from him (since he is gay). im pretty positive the parents know who it is. even the parents telling the other guy he will always be part of their lives. they got him some therapy and stuff. couple years go by. everyone is living happily ever after (fucking cried for this one)

you know the story : childhood friends. one is in love with the other the entire time. other guy is fucking gorgeous / sexy (no seriously. hot.) he's been sleeping around with other guys (uke. hot.) He confesses, telling him he's done holding back and wants him to like him back. not sure what happened. they started dating naturally. then when they went to have sex. uke froze up and shoved him off was clearly petrified of something from his past but gave some BS reason like he just couldn't do it with him. time jump two years later. did i mention how HOT the uke is?? with the piercings too??? my uke is running from a very large trauma: -his mother had a daughter whom died before he was born -enter twisted -she had him, named him after her, and was all wrarped. making him dress and behave like a girl until he hit puberty. then called him disgusting and refused to look at him. she rejected him completely. -enter fucked up teacher -maniputalive little shit who saw an innocent wounded kid. who just wanted to be loved and accepted. he pretended to do so. giving him all the pillow talk he wanted in bed. then gave him cold, harsh words. getting married and telling him they had no future. uke cut his heart off from here. later: he does love saku. he thinks saku is more than enought even though saku believes otherwise. it's our uke whom feels scared. he feels his isn't good enough. and the thought of his touching him with love and affection, and accepting that kind of thing. scares the shit out of him. so he runs. --------------------------- ch. 7 unrelated innocent youths. good story too

gaming group failed for trophy 5 years running everyone in this group seems to be wounded and carrying something around. not super invested yet. on to - ch.25

we got step brothers here both are in love with each other the older brother hates women. being around them, and their perfume makes him physically ill. literally will puke no interest in sex. this of course turns into the younger brother offering to show him pleasure, by trying if he is fine with a male instead. makes him think it's only sex, to relieve their urges. his trauma is due to being with only his slutty mother, whom never loved or wanted him. had sex in front of him. until she let her boyfriends touch him too. she always saw him as an enemy, and told him repeatedly "Just die" something happened, was abandoned by her. they found his father, and lived with him. he's a good, decent guy. the little brother knows all these things. he's several years younger, but not much he's always loved and adored him. yet, at the same time, true to being a man, looks after him. even if he is mad or upset, he never once leaves him alone when he is upset of feeling bad. he takes care of him properly always. (fucking adorable scene of older brother slightly drink, sitting in his lap on a park bench.)

dad died in hit and run accident ( pedestrian) was right there with him when it happened. was injured as well, but survived. left them in debut he thinks everyone around him is a horrible person. they want something they don't do anything for free. he keeps trying to give the guy he's living with sex. he won't. (kids got a broken arm, and he helps him with everything he needs) the last guy he sept with too. broke that trust. his mother didn't raise him right or proper. (he's the first person in his life to give him love.) mother-fucker makes me cry