hataki's manga / #trauma(84)

accident with all three of them in the car head on collision instantly killed parents he walked away with a blow to the head and a broken arm. his male relative was the only thing he had left. in his fear and anxiety he became his everything. and his anxieties sky rocked. his trauma and PTSD had him trying to get more from him than he was willing to give. because they were family (no. he wasn't in love with him. it was more a mental breakdown) he felt too embareesaed being rejected. he stayed away for a time. Falling to the clutches of a shitty guy who did drugs, and gave him drugs and forced him into sex. for a long time. by the time he pulled away. he was so beaten (physically beaten and mentally) he went to school. to the roof top . with every intention of ending his life. ran into the beautiful long haired blonde beauty. they quickly started dating and falling in love. fully bearing all their scars and past issues to one another seeking comfort and love from one another. both hate themselves. but love each other fiercely. helped him reconnect and make up with his male relative. -our seme too, hates himself, and has a darkness inside of him. he was born and abandoned. his father, his mother, and his half-brothers all tossed him away like garbage.

rather good read

dick. dont like

memory loss after accident at age 10. lives with "mother", and "brother" who took him in and blamed and beat him. suffers from panic disorder so badly he passes out in extreme stress. can't ride in cars gets severerly car sick "family", live off his parents inheritance. blame him for the loss of father. he doesn't remember that his mother and father died, in the accident he suffered alongside them. trauma is blocking all this. starts working at a flower shop, offering room and board for employees. meets a cranky boss, with severe insomnia. comes from a rich family even at the age of 4, refused to let him sleep at all. beat him and forced him into studying at all hors. he ran away with a fever for a time. ended up staying with a nice family with a son frequently. who owned a flower shop they made him feel like family. of course, they met already. the flower shop is theirs too. he took it over and bought it. he can only sleep peacefully around him. and of course. our guy keeps reacting to his scent. mostly, due to his subconscious recognizing it, even if he can't. shitty "brother" and "mother" character show up seme basically tells said "brother", he knows he's bullshitting and not related to him at all. he honestly tells our uke he likes him. he tells him what their past was. and that the flower shop too, was important to them both. he doesn't hide any of this. now dating, after both confessing. our uke's all "i don't care if i remember the past. i like you now". grew to be rather mellow-dramatic....

all were in school together, majoring in photography. the two always had a subconcious thing for each other, even if they never got together. was in an 8 year relationship hate his ex. he broke up and left him. having put up with enough. he was forced to put his feelings on the back burner and put his feelings first. he let him give up on himself and his career. while he continued forward with his support. he never once told his friends or family even told multiple people "that disgusting" or "why would you suggest something like that". whenever people asked if they were dating. it was a super hero complex, he felt he had to "protect him" never said i love you. he just crushed him all together. it was a one-sided relationship the entire time. the ukes's friends knew about them. his parents know and kicked him out after beating the shit out of him. after his parents, loosing his career, and his relationship from hell what's that leave him? = some heavy ass wounded self esteem. loss of his back bone or ability to speak up for himself. what he wants. what he needs. what makes him angry or upset. enter his boss, who has watched them together over the years. he gets with him at this time. giving him a place to stay. said he was interested in him. (not romantically. ) they started hooking up. things of course get super messed up. because the uke is so damaged and fresh out of that relationship. as well as our boss/ seme being from a fucked up, broken home. both father and mother always, always walk into his life to ask for money. as he is succesful dad cheated on mom first. then it became like a competition. who could get the better relationship, and mooch off their son too. to say the least, he doesn't believe in love. he's never felt it or recieved it. he was honest from the start about this. he even points out, you know, that he watched them together for 8 years, and even they broke it off. so while he is interested in our uke. he's also bothered that they broke up at all. it's complicated for our seme to deal with the emotions he has only ever felt with our uke here. he only finds himself caring about him. only desiring him. only wanting to bully him. or be kind to him. or feeling so angry and frustrated. he blows up often, at the uke being a pushover with him too. he's always doing mean things, then yelling at him to "fight. push me back. tell me no", essentially telling him to not put up with it. basically from the start, our uke loved him, and he loved him too. even if it took a lot to get there. they seperated for a time. restarting on themselves. our boss/seme was more accepting of the fact that he in fact loved him and wanted to be with him. he was kinder to not only our uke, but to others around him. even set set the guys ex up, to start up his own studio. still teases him to no end. still a beast in bed. Our uke grew back his self-esteem, went back to photography, starting a studio for weddings. both straight and gay couples. he's finally stopped feeling insecure about what others think. he's proud in their relationship. he's mean and bullies him right back now. but also accepting that while he is innocent in bed, he also happens to have a pretty crazy lewd side to himself with his new boyfriend (that ex of his must of been a bad lay. their are plenty of things, our seme did to him and for him, for the first time. up to and including making him cum just with foreplay. ) seme never cheated on him once. Our uke, he was only the nd person he ever slept with or dated. they come back together. both with their own studios and living together. as new, healed people <3

nothings happened so far with them they both clearly have feelings our gay guy (black haired), knows already. our straight (white haired), is in denial. white haired guy has always been color blind. ' for whatever reason he only saw a shinning burst of color around this guy. he followed him. whenever he holds his finger or hands, he can see and experience lights and colors to their fullest. got hired on by our black haired designer as a temp. assistant. for the 2 weeks his girl was gone. (lol. LOVE his girl. she knows him inside and out. even kicks his ass into gear to help him get the other guy to stay later) our black haired guy was betrayed by his ex-boyfriend / step-brother. stole and plagiarized his work. but alas, only our guy caught the backlash from it. suffers trauma and withdrawal thanks to him. at the time. he was in the hospital for stress in the past. some people were real nasty. even put razors in the muffins he ate there. messed with his drinks in the past too. this created a phobia and eating disorder. when these two first met. they went out. he refused to drink the alcohol he got him. or eat the cake either. once he caved to eat even one bite. he wound up puking and passing out. he was avoiding everything until he met this guy. he protects him. he does his job properly. he is a friend. he is some one he confides in. had a lot of gasterital related problems. ate only noodles from the store, coffee, and these meat sticks. he tossed it all out moved in with him and cooked all his meals for him. managing his stress and food intake. later had surgery too. related to GI problems. stomach acid was burning a literal hole into his stomach. moved back in with him here. poor guy in unrequited love. trusts this guy completely. (still has yet to come forward about his being color blind) -small things pile up over time both have complicated and rejecting families. they both have shitty brothers whom their parents put first. black haired is adopted from an orphanage. his ex is back in the picture and bat shit crazy. -ch. 74 boring as hell....

1st time having sex went bad partner told him to at least pretend to enjoy it. that his face was making him limp. trauma. avoids people sex and relationships incoming hook up party. playboy in class convinced him to go. took his drunk ass home or planned to until he threw up on them both. took him to hotel. ended up hooking up with some light foreplay. now the games begin. with 2 people who don't want relationships. where one is great at sex. and the other refuses to go all the way. _______________________ we got our playboy seme invites him over to play video games on a game he can't clear. listens to him about his trauma. flat out replies, "That's not your fault. it's the seme's job to make the uke feel good" XD then goes on and on about "Life is too depressing to hate sex over such an idiot guy. of course offers to "help him". getting him used to touch and being intimate. one level at a time. (he fucking held his hand.) <3 love this right now. _______________________ actually made a 10 point list of things for him to overcome from softcore to hardcore. staying with him to help out with it. going through them at his own pace one by one. got into some light foreplay jerking off together.

neighbors. one is a virgin - gay-uke. whom has given up on romance or getting laid. playboy seme offers to have sex with him. has suffered injuries. seems to of played baseball now can't both carry their own version of trauma around. knows it's dumb. been months now. spend every day together. shopping, doing chores, eating, sex. all of it. clear affection from both parties even though they insist it's just sex. may be the first time either of them has smiled in a long time or found joy again.